She’s been by your side as you’ve grown up; you’ve shared your deepest and darkest secrets with one another and you’ve wept over guys who have totally crushed your hearts. You’ve probably bickered, split wine over her favourite top and celebrated over drunken bubbly before holding back her hair as she throws up.
It’s now time to celebrate once again because she’s finally about to marry the man of her dreams. She’s asked you to be her chief bridesmaid which means there are exciting times ahead!
However, there is, of course, going to be several duties and roles that you’ll be getting involved with to ensure that things run as smoothly as possible. From venue advice to bridal hairstyles tips, you will be an invaluable asset to the bride.
If you’re a bit worried or feeling a little overwhelmed about all of this, then here are our 13 tips on being the best chief bridesmaid you possibly can.
Listen to the Bride
This is a pretty important one and one you must follow with dedication. If the bride has asked you to sort the wedding flowers and has specifically requested that she wants tulips in her bouquet, then you need to follow her wishes. Even if you personally think that Lily of the Valley would be much better, this is her special day, not yours, so always listen to what she would like.
Arrange a Hen Party She’ll Love
As chief bridesmaid, you’ll be in charge of arranging the hen party but do make sure that it’s something she’ll enjoy. If she’s clearly stated she wants a relaxed and low key weekend, then she definitely won’t appreciate novelty balloons resembling the male anatomy and visiting greased up hunks with super sculptured bodies, who wish to gyrate against her in teeny tiny pants (even if the other girls are enthusiastic). Gear your ideas towards something more chilled, such as a spa experience, a delicious dinner or perhaps a cocktail making session – she’ll absolutely love it!
Be Prepared to Become Her Agony Aunt
This is definitely one to be expected. As best friends you’ve already got some good experience of this role, so it’s nothing to worry about. Getting married is an emotional rollercoaster and things don’t always go to plan. There will be problems, issues, maybe even catastrophes. As her best friend, you’ll be the one that she turns to so get ready to provide some top advice, make her laugh and generally just put a smile on her face. Alternatively, if that fails, cracking open a bottle of wine is a good idea too – we’re just putting that one out there.
Keep Up to Date With the Latest Emails and Updates
Make sure you keep track of any emails regarding your hen weekend accommodation, experiences and bookings. If anything changes, you’ll need to notify the bride and guests straight away. Turning up to a cancelled restaurant reservation is not going to go down well, trust us!
Don’t Chit Chat Behind Her Back
Sure, there will be times when your bestie turns into a total bridezilla but honestly, that’s tb expected. Arranging a wedding is a majorly stressful business, so just be there for her and support her as much as you can. That advice applies even when she’s on the verge of self-combusting because the caterers have had to cancel the date of her menu tasting. Venting behind her back is a no-go. And, if you’re getting it all off your chest to the queen of gossip from your friendship group, chances are that word will get back to the bride and will no doubt cause upset. It’s not worth it, so just take a deep breath, exhale and smile
Get to Know the Other Bridesmaids
Get to know the others girls that will be walking down the aisle with you; it will make the bride happy to see her closest pals getting friendly. Even if ‘Melissa from uni’ is totally annoying and has the loudest and most irritating laugh possible, just go with it - you never know, you might just make a few new friends yourself.
Don’t Get Wasted at the Reception
Just because the bride and groom have officially tied the knot and you’ve stuffed your belly full of delicious food, doesn’t mean that it’s time for you to get completely and utterly drunk. You’ll probably still be expected to engage in some polite chit chat with members of the bride’s family and her friends, so it’s a good idea to be on top form. We’re not saying don’t drink at all; by all means get merry and have a great time, just don’t make a fool out of yourself by necking shots at the bar, making a scene and then falling asleep next to the groom's great aunt Maureen. This isn’t Magaluf 2009
Put Her Needs First
Always put the bride first – it’s going to be one of the most precious days of her life and things need to go just perfect for her. If there is anything you can do, no matter how big or small, help her out as much as you can to try and make a difference. You’ll definitely be up there in the nominees for best bridesmaid ever, that’s for sure!
Love the Dress
If the bride’s chosen a dress that really isn’t your colour, then don’t make too much of a fuss. This is another one of those situations where you just have to ‘go with it’.
Chances are that she’s got great taste, so this won’t even be a situation that you have to deal with. After all, it’s not like you’re on an episode of ‘Don’t Tell the Bride’, where the groom’s just secured a cracking deal on some 100% polyester stretch dresses in hot pink down the local market with the remaining £43 of the budget…
Utilise Your Main Skill to Help the Bride Out
If you’ve got any skills that would benefit the bride and groom for their big day, then you should certainly let the bride know. Perhaps you’re a graphic designer. If so, you could design some really cute invitations for guests, or, maybe you know someone that works at the local florists who could offer a discount on the wedding flowers. If so, every little helps, and the bride will be so appreciative of you for going that extra mile.
Have Some Time Out – Just the Two of You
Organise for you and the bride to spend some time together away from the stresses of wedding planning. Go for a long walk in the country, go for a delicious gingerbread latte or even a relaxing treatment at the beauty salon to help unwind. It will do her good to have some time out from thinking about the wedding and have a laugh with her best friend.
Calm Her Nerves
She might be a bit of a nervous wreck before that walk down the aisle, so she's going to need her number one wing girl to give her a few strong words of support. Words of encouragement and a few private jokes will be more than enough to make her feel a bit less nervy.
Well, really this one’s self-explanatory. Have a truly wonderful day! This is your best friend’s wedding, so make sure you enjoy every single moment with her on the special day, and remember to get some great photos of the two of – it’s easily forgetting amongst the hustle and bustle of the big day.